Relationships should add value and bring out the best in everyone involved. But as humans, we’ll always have conflicts because of our differences—some of those conflicts we should never tolerate. When we go into relationships, we look for people we share things in common with.
The more similar we are in our beliefs, attitudes, and interests, the fewer conflicts we’ll have.
But sometimes, our differences aren’t immediately apparent until we’ve entered into the relationship. We get too deep before we realize how different we are and how little we have in common. Sometimes the differences are pronounced, and other times they’re not.
It’s possible to exist with differences and not have any issues as long as they’re tolerable and need no resolution.
We resolve any differences that don’t create any issues through compromises. A disagreement here or an argument there is not enough to bring a relationship to an end.
So what should end a relationship?
Here are some things you want to think about and make yourself aware of. They are some of the things you should never tolerate in a relationship.
What You Should Never Tolerate in a Relationship
Never tolerate a lack of compromise
You agree to things when you’re putting in more than you’re getting back from the relationship, but you’re never happy about the outcome. If you’re never pleased with the compromises you make, maybe you’re submitting and not compromising.
In a compromise, everyone involved should have a level of satisfaction.
You should be OK with the outcome. You may not necessarily be happy, but you should not be sad or feel cheated.
Never tolerate any form of abuse
You should never tolerate abuse in a relationship, whether physical, emotional or mental abuse. The moment you recognize any signs of abuse, walk away as fast as possible and don’t look back.
No matter how much you’ve invested in the relationship or how much you live them.
Abuse can get very dark and cost you dearly, so get out as fast as possible. It’s not worth sticking around and hoping things change.
Never tolerate jealousy
Jealousy in a partnership is a sign of mistrust and insecurity. If you are in a relationship and the person you’re with shows signs of jealousy or obsession, get out of there fast.
Jealousy and obsession can quickly turn into something far more sinister. It’s a destructive emotion that can suck the life out of a happy relationship.
It’s very unhealthy to be in a relationship where everything you do is viewed through suspicion and insecurity.
Never tolerate body shaming
Nobody should have to body shame you, especially not your partner, even if it comes off as a disrespectful joke or concern.
Every person’s body is different, and if someone is dating you, they should be empowering your body image.
Instead of making you feel insecure about it. Respect is fundamental in relationships. Body shaming shows a lack of respect, and degrading someone about their physical appearance is a form of abuse.
Never tolerate cheating
Cheating breaks trust. Once trust is broken, it isn’t easy to maintain a happy, positive relationship with that person going forward. There’ll always be concerns about how you’re valued.
It breaks down your confidence and makes you question your self-worth. If you have standards and value your self-worth, infidelity isn’t something you should tolerate.
When you go into a relationship, you expect to be treated with dignity and respect. Cheating strips you of all that.
Never tolerate controlling behavior
They want to make all the decisions for you. Deciding that they know exactly how you feel about things without asking you about it, or they disrespect your boundaries – wanting you to do things their way, even when you make your wishes and desires known.
They think they know what’s best for you and demand things from you that go against what you want.
If your partner is controlling, please do something about it.
Never tolerate belittling your goals and ambitions
Nobody should ever feel that their goals don’t matter or that they will not achieve them. Your partner should be nothing less than supportive and understanding.
They should do everything they can to support what they want to achieve in life. If they think that their goals are superior or more important than yours, you’re not in the right relationship.
Never tolerate gaslighting
As another form of abuse, gaslighting often occurs in toxic relationships. It leaves a sense of trauma even after the relationship is over. You are being gaslighted when they manipulate things in their favor.
Or when their narcissism makes you believe that you’re always at fault.
You shouldn’t ever tolerate this if your partner is gaslighting you, no matter how much you adore them. A healthy relationship does not inflict pain of any kind.
Never tolerate hiding you from their loved ones
That’s a massive red flag when someone tries their best to hide you from their loved ones. They may have something to hide and are not completely honest with you about their life.
Keeping you a secret when you don’t want to be a secret may also signify that they’re ashamed or embarrassed by you.
There’s no reason you should be a secret from their friends and family, especially if you’re already in a relationship and are past the dating stage.
Never tolerate not acknowledging your feelings
Even if your emotions and expressions aren’t always appropriate or fitting for the moment, your partner should acknowledge them. They should accept how you feel and be supportive.
If they have any reservations, questions, or concerns, you can discuss that later. Your feelings are valid, and there’s a reason for it.
A good relationship should respect individual personalities and allow room for your character to grow. Not trying to stifle your growth. You should be able to express your feelings freely.
Never tolerate not listening or constantly interrupting you
They can hear you, but they’re not listening to your words. Or they interrupt you and talk over you when you’re saying something – refusing to connect with what you’re saying or seeming disinterested.
If someone makes you feel like you’re not worth even a second of their time to listen to you, you need someone who listens to you. It’s time to move on.
Jill Davis, author for Life So Ever
Jill Davis grew up on army bases in the USA and Germany and has spent her adult life on the East Coast. She resides in Virginia where she gets to enjoy lots of hiking trails, kayaking, and other outdoor adventures. No recipe intimidates her and she is always up to try most foods. Her second language is sarcasm and she always looks for the good in life.